The pandemic left many people questioning their marriages and why they must remain in an unfulfilling relationship just because of their time. Separating has become easier for both parties to file, and there are many reasons one can do this nowadays.
In fact, there are many shelters, agencies, support groups, and NGOs that are designed to help women recover from separating and live their best life. Seeing young women advocate for themselves and leave unfulfilling marriages has also been very inspiring for the older generation of wives who thought they would have to stay stuck in their unhappy marriages simply because they had lasted so long.
If this sounds like you and makes you more determined to proceed with the process, you first need to get a good and highly recommended divorce attorney. Even in this day and age where women can be financially independent, there is still a financial risk to women from this procedure that is higher than for men.
They can earn more, and it can be hard to maintain the lifestyle you are used to without their income. But as long as you have a good lawyer and be very meticulous about your financial affairs, you can recover from the financial hit a lot faster than you may think.
Make an Inventory of Assets
This is a pretty basic start that your lawyer will ask for, so it’s best to have it ready before you begin the process. If the separation is acrimonious, it can also protect you if your spouse tries to hide assets.
If you had no real idea of your joint assets, spending, loans, and retirement savings, this is a crucial step. It will be the first step on your path to financial independence. Make sure to change your insurance policies as soon as you file for this process. These monies should no longer go to your partner but to your children, relatives, or special causes you believe in and support.
Let Go of the House
The house has been in such good shape because there has been a good income or even a joint income to keep it maintained. But maintaining a large family home on a single income is going to be very draining. Property fees and taxes do not shrink just because only one person is paying the bills.
You may feel an emotional need to hold onto the house your children grew up in, but you cannot allow it to drain your savings and energy. Sell the house and use the profits to get yourself a smaller place that is suited exactly to your tastes and much easier on your budget.
Know About Their Debts
This can have a larger impact on you, depending on which state you are getting separated in. You should find out as much as you can about the debt for your lawyer to advise you properly. Some states hold both spouses equally responsible for paying down debt even when only one person took the loan or caused the debt. So even if it is not in your name, you might still be held responsible for paying it along with your spouse.
If you do not trust your spouse’s account of their debts, it might be a good idea to hire a private investigator to find out everything they can about any loans, credit card debts, payday loans, etc., that your spouse may be hiding. Your lawyer may even help you get a private investigator for a cheaper rate as they may know some to help them gather evidence.
Learn About Taxes
You can be taxed for any financial matters pertaining to this procedure, from alimony to child support. Be very careful to run any offers by your lawyer and financial advisor before accepting anything. Even verbal agreements can be used against you by a spouse who does not want to make it easy to leave.
Understand the tax consequences of every settlement type and continue negotiating until you find the best one for you and your kids. If you are not worried about the financial aspect of things, choose the option that leaves you free as soon as possible with the least amount of tax hits.
Even adult children can get hurt by their parents separating. Your children might make more requests on your time, demand you move in with them, or ask for financial help. It will be challenging, but you need to prioritize yourself during the proceedings.
You took care of your kids, and they are now adults with homes and lives of their own. It is finally time for you to find out who you are outside of marriage and parenting. Do not give in to pressure. Communicate with your children that you must put your needs first and will support them when you are settled physically and mentally.